A Cry For Justice

Awakening the Evangelical Church to Domestic Violence and Abuse in its Midst

Tag Archives: covert aggression

Red Riding Hood and the Wolf – first pub 2012

Trigger warning. She was tripping along the woodland path, picking flowers. What a beautiful yellow flower!  Its warm yellow color reminds me of how God forgives us for our sins, and how we are to forgive others!  I’ll pick it for Grandma. And what lovely pink flowers! Look at how they grow in clumps, and …

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When it’s not safe to spend Christmas with family

Some survivors of abuse make the decision that it is not wise to spend Christmas with family. Others predetermine strict boundaries about how and where they will participate in family gatherings. And for some people it is simply impossible to spend Christmas with family or friends. (John 7:1-13) After that, Jesus went about in Galilee, …

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Coercion and control are the very heart of how an abuser operates: they’re not an added extra.

Viewing coercive control as just one more manifestation of domestic abuse is to utterly misunderstand what is happening in a victim’s life, says Jane Monckton-Smith, senior lecturer in criminology and an expert in coercive control at the university of Gloucestershire. She argues that coercion and control are the very heart of how an abuser operates: …

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Thursday Thought — Overt and Covert Aggression

Two Important Types of Aggression Two of the most fundamental types of fighting. . . are overt and covert aggression.  When you’re determined to have your way or gain advantage and you’re open, direct, and obvious in your manner of fighting, your behavior is best labeled overtly aggressive.   When you’re out to “win”, get …

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Is Silence Golden In Abuse?

In the quiet of the sleepy morning, I find myself, as I often do, on the bottom of the stairs in my home, cuddling my two kids, who are triggering and on high alert. I often am too, in the mornings. The three of us are afraid a lot at that time of day. My …

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They Do It in Secret

Abusers almost always abuse in secret, unless they have gotten sloppy . . . and then they leak.  But that is a different blog post. For the most part, abusers jab and mock (emotionally, physically and verbally) when no one but the victim can feel it, see it or hear it. This is part of …

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