A Cry For Justice

Awakening the Evangelical Church to Domestic Violence and Abuse in its Midst

Tag Archives: victims’ resistance

The abuser’s deceptive way of asking questions; and Jesus’ shrewd use of questions to stymie the wicked

Originally posted on A Cry For Justice:
Telling the truth is central to Christianity. In the lead-up to my conversion, God pricked me multiple times about how I was a liar and I had to stop doing it.  Buckling on the belt of truth is the first step in donning the armor of God. If we don’t put on truth, the rest…

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Stockholm Syndrome, codependency and other labels used to pathologize, blame and discredit victims.

There are many labels used to pathologise, blame and discredit victims: Stockholm Syndrome battered women’s syndrome learned helplessness codependency traumatic bonding re-enactment of trauma repetition compulsion women choose abusive men women unconsciously attract abusive men The concept of “Stockholm Syndrome” has become a ‘received truth’ in the mental health field. It shifts the focus away …

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Unhelpful Comments by Well-Meaning People: A coaching clinic for victims of domestic abuse and their supporters

Your platitudes are proverbs of ashes  (Job 13:12a) Domestic abuse victims frequently find themselves misunderstood by those from whom they seek support. Such interchanges can be extremely distressing for victims — they feel at a loss as to how to respond to the attitude of the supporter. Frequently supporters don’t mean to hurt; it happens …

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Comforting My Church With the Comfort They Gave – by Julie Cleaveland

Julie Cleaveland was married to a very wicked man. When she sought help from her church, she got the usual bad treatments. She published this letter to her former church leaders to highlight the bias in their thinking. Dear Former Church Leaders, I was surprised to hear that your head pastor and you parted ways …

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Leslie Vernick – various responses that domestic abuse victims have to her work. (5th & final in series on SBC’s ChurchCares program)

Some victims of domestic abuse find Leslie Vernick’s work helpful; others find it confusing and even dangerous. To illustrate the range of responses that victims have to Leslie’s work, I will be quoting from their comments. Most of my quotes will be excerpts from victims’ comments and I will give links to their original comments …

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Victims resist abuse in prudent, determined and creative ways

Alongside each history of abuse, there runs a parallel history of prudent, determined and often creative resistance. This is one of the things I’ve learned from Dr Allan Wade & his colleague Linda Coates. They are Canadian counselors have worked with many survivors of oppression and abuse; they also train other counselors and victim-advocates. Note: …

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