All the things I didn’t tell you — a guest post

You may have wondered, "How could that marriage have ended? They seemed so sweet. So together. So loving."  We made a pretty picture. Gaggle of adorable children. Serious Christians. Dedicated to our faith and family. Oh yes. When I left, you thought I was just giving him a wake-up call, probably. You understand that. Husbands… Continue reading All the things I didn’t tell you — a guest post

‘Fred and Marie’ fictional video — This is not fiction for some couples

TRIGGER WARNING:  This video is 15 minutes in length and will almost certainly trigger some, so please be prepared. "Fred et marie" is a video produced by Bonjour, Inc. It is in French, but there are English subtitles.  This video does an excellent job of portraying coercive control, entrapment, social abuse & isolation, emotional abuse,… Continue reading ‘Fred and Marie’ fictional video — This is not fiction for some couples

One crazy-making ally-obtaining tactic of an abuser: simultaneous scorn and imitation

Our thanks to Rebecca Davis for submitting this post. It was written with the permission of the abuse survivor whose story it is. *** When Lydia was young she was very creative, and the other girls at school liked to copy her creative ideas. She didn’t like being copied, but her mother assured her, “Imitation… Continue reading One crazy-making ally-obtaining tactic of an abuser: simultaneous scorn and imitation

Monday Mourning

Today I sit on my daughter’s empty bed again and just cry. I’m exhausted from a week of trying to undo yet again, what my ex did the week before. My life now is handling tantrums and rages born of fear, frustration, hurt and confusion. It’s crawling under benches and beds, to sit with my… Continue reading Monday Mourning

The Love Dare, a dangerous book in the hands of an abuser — by Deborah

We want to thank Deborah for her willingness to share another part of her story with us.... *** Anybody heard of The Love Dare [by Alex Kendrick and Stephen Kendrick.]? If you have seen the movie Fireproof [Internet Archive link]1, you will know that The Love Dare is a book given to the main character… Continue reading The Love Dare, a dangerous book in the hands of an abuser — by Deborah

Gaslighters in the Bible

Any of this sound familiar? Dathan and Abiram Numbers 16:12-13  And Moses sent to call Dathan and Abiram the sons of Eliab, and they said, “We will not come up. Is it a small thing that you have brought us up out of a land flowing with milk and honey, to kill us in the… Continue reading Gaslighters in the Bible

Signs of an abusive relationship — where the abuse is hard to recognize

If your partner is displaying a combination of these behaviors, you may have a potential violent person on your hands. This list is adapted from “Signs to Look for in a Battering Personality,” from the Project for Victims of Family Violence, Fayetteville, Arkansas, and can be found at the archive of ARMS (Abuse Recovery Ministry… Continue reading Signs of an abusive relationship — where the abuse is hard to recognize