“Jean” (her pseudonym), was seriously abused by her first husband when they were members of Doug Wilson’s CREC (Communion of Reformed Evangelical Churches) church in Moscow Idaho. Jean’s story touches on many of the things my readers have experienced: domestic abuse, spiritual abuse, sexual abuse, rape in marriage, financial abuse, systemic abuse, legal abuse, shared custody. Needless to say, Jean’s abusive husband remains in good standing at Doug Wilson’s church. Jean has escaped Doug Wilson’s net, but is still being financially and verbally abused by her ex.
Listen to Jean tell her story: Groomed to Submit: Abuse in the CREC, Part 2
That link takes you to PodBean, but to see other options for listening, go to the Sons Of Patriarchy homepage.
Don’t be put off by the name “Sons of Patriarchy”. The podcast is against Patriarchy: it is exposing Doug Wilson and his evil ideology that has infiltrated into so many churches and homes around the world. I recommend you follow the podcast. It is comprehensively dealing with all aspects of Doug Wilson, his CREC denomination, and his educational system, including the home-schooling materials that have touched the lives of so many of my readers. The podcast will have many more interviews with survivors.
After Jean’s story, you will hear Emilie Paige Dye’s story. As a 17 year old student, Emilie was groomed and sexually abused by a teacher at Logos School, one of the many institutions which Doug Wilson has spawned.
UPDATE added February 17, 2025:
When I first published this post, the Private Survivor Support Group (on Facebook) which Sons of Patriarchy are pointing survivors to was run by Sarah McDugal. Sarah is no longer a moderator of that group (although to my knowledge she is still a member of the group). The group is now run by a woman I respect and trust. She used the name Inkling when she commented at this post. Read Inkling’s comment here.
This is why I have struck though my original Caution and Warning below.
[End of Feb 17, 2025 update.]
Caution and Warning
I would caution my readers not to join the Private Survivor Support Group (a Facebook group) which Sons of Patriarchy are pointing survivors to. Why? Because it is run by Sarah McDugal (Wilderness to Wild).
I have a very bad feeling about Sarah McDugal. For example, Sarah says that if the victim tells an abuser to leave, then SHE’S coercively controlling and being abusive to HIM. Sarah McDugal doesn’t understand that victims always resist abuse. Sarah has no understanding of Response-Based Practice.
Kate Palmer Bowers has compiled evidence [Archive link] showing that Sarah McDugal is saying and doing things which are not helpful to victims of abuse.
[February 17, 2025: Editors’ notes:
—For some comments made prior to February 17, 2025 that quoted from the post, the text in the comment that was quoted from the post might no longer be an exact match.
—For some comments made prior to February 17, 2025 that quoted from the post, the text in the comment that was quoted from the post might no longer be found in the post.
If you would like to compare the text in the comments made prior to February 17, 2025 that quoted from the post to the post as it is now (February 17, 2025), click here [Internet Archive link] for the most recent Internet Archive copy of the post.]
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Dear Barbara,
Thank you, excellent article.
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Barbara, thank you for including a link to that video playlist – Response-Based Practice.
Tons of wisdom tidbits to be gained there. I never before heard such a clear analysis of abuse.
Even though its basis is purely secular and not at all religious, this is something I will be sharing with my fellow former Christian cult member and increasingly adept YouTube whistle-blower, Ruth Wise.
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Hi priestlyscribe, I’m glad you appreciated that link.
I’ve looked at a bit of Ruth Wise’s material. She’s clearly a survivor of abuse! I was sad to see her repeating the “God hates divorce” mantra, which is based on a mistranslation of Malachi 2:16.
“God hates divorce” is a mistranslation — Malachi 2:16 Digest
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Barb,
Not to be or sound cynical…. 😊
In your post, you wrote:
Why am I not surprised….
In your post, you also wrote:
(The bold was done by me.)
Again, why am I not surprised….
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I wanted to update you to let you know that while Sarah still is the admin for the group, she is very rarely active. After seeing delays in posting what survivors were wanting to share, I reached out to her and the podcast team to ask if I could help. After enough persistence, she allowed me to become a moderator. I am in the group daily working to approve posts in a timely manner, and vet each member request as thoroughly as possible now that Sarah’s original way of vetting members was quietly removed without telling anyone. My goal is to make sure survivors feel supported, safe, protected, and empowered to share. Over the years, I have been a dedicated peer support person and advocate in a few areas where traumas have happened, and feel that my role is one where God and I take the harm that happened to me and we heal it together so it can be useful to bring healing to others. My heart is to be a shepherd and nurturer.
While I am limited since I’m not an admin and only a moderator, and since Sarah would have to appoint me as an admin, there is still a small risk. But the team has had a chance to get to know me, and I think if Sarah tried to do anything harmful that the team would step in. At some point, I hope she decides to allow me to be an admin and that she quietly removes herself since she has already said she is extremely busy working in her other groups that have thousands of survivors. In the meantime, I’ve committed that no abuses will happen on my watch, and that any issues that come up will be taken care of in such a way that survivors feel safe.
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Inkling,
You wrote (12th February 2025):
From what you write, it sounds like you do a very good job of helping survivors feel supported, safe, and protected, which does, indeed, lead many — if not most(?) — people to feel emboldened to share. 😊
You wrote:
I would hope that, having seen you in action — and so having seen the difference 😊 — that the team would step in if necessary if Sarah (McDugal) tried anything harmful. 😊 And I would question the ability of ANY advocate — and in this case, I’m referring to Sarah (McDugal) — to be able to keep followers supported, safe, and protected when they have other groups with thousands of (victims and?) survivors.
I’m glad the group has you as a moderator. 😊
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Thank you, Inkling. I will update the ‘caution’ in my post and point readers to your comment.
Dear readers in general, I have spoken at length to Inking and I’m confident that she is an honest person.
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I have updated this post again. My update reads as follows:
When I first published this post, the Private Survivor Support Group (on Facebook) which Sons of Patriarchy are pointing survivors to was run by Sarah McDugal. Sarah is no longer a moderator of that group (although to my knowledge she is still a member of the group). The group is now run by a woman I respect and trust. She used the name Inkling when she commented at this post. Read Inkling’s comment here.
This is why I have struck though my original Caution and Warning.
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