Australia is not the only place where children are being forced to have contact with abusers by the legal system. Caution: For some readers, some of the linked articles may be triggering.
What is the so-called evangelical church doing about any of this?
I answer that ^ question at the bottom of this post. I also give a safety reminder to readers who follow us on Facebook at the bottom of this post.
I’ve heard about family courts ordering children into unsafe situations from countless protective parents around the world. It’s happening in the USA, Canada, UK, Netherlands, Japan, Africa, India, New Zealand. Dear readers, feel free to add other countries to my list in the comments thread. However, this post focuses on Australia because that’s where the following mainstream media articles come.
Australian children are being placed in harm’s way by the legal structure designed to determine their best interests — the family law system – by Emily Clark and Heidi Davoren, ABCNews, June 13, 2019.
This ^ in-depth report includes accounts from survivors, a man and a woman (not related). When they were kids, they were forced to be with their abusive parent by the family court.
Family Court report writer charged with sexually abusing three children – by Heidi Davoren and Josh Robertson, ABCNews, Aug 26, 2019. Excerpt:
The psychologist, who has since been charged with sexually abusing three children, was appointed by the Family Court to make custody recommendations in cases where one parent had accused the other of sexual abuse.
One of Australia’s foremost family law experts said it could open the way for custody rulings involving the expert to be overturned.
Psychologist facing child sex charges granted conditional bail – Sydney Morning Herald, Jan 31, 2019. Excerpt:
Dr Bob Montgomery was extradited to NSW from Queensland.
Montgomery, who was granted bail at Byron Bay Local Court on Thursday, has been charged with two counts of buggery and nine counts of indecent assault on a male.
We know that serial pedophiles love to work and volunteer in places where they have access to children. If you doubt this, read Predators: Pedophiles, Rapists, And Other Sex Offenders by Anna Salter. She sets it out in great detail with lots of case studies.
Dr Bob Montgomery is not only a psychologist. He was a scoutmaster years ago. Ugh. Nothing new under the sun.
Former Sydney Scoutmaster in court over child sex assault charges – by Rachel Clun, Sydney Morning Herald, January 31, 2019.
Dr Bob Montgomery is not the only one.
Paul Wilson had an eminent career as a criminologist in Australia and overseas (see Wikipedia article). It stands to reason that he must have directly or through his academic teaching influenced what was going on in the Family Court. But all the time he’d been guilty of sexually abusing a young girl.
Criminologist Paul Wilson jailed over ‘brazen’ child sexual abuse – The Guardian, Australia, Nov 24, 2016.
Because some protective parents have found Family Court psychologists so appalling, and the Family Court so blind to the injustices that are going on, they have tried to hold Family Court psychologists accountable through the medical system. This next link explains.
Family Court expert referred to Medical Council after parents lodge complaints by Emily Clark and Heidi Davoren, ABCNews, Sept 4, 2018. Excerpt:
One parent advocate told the ABC challenging a family report, or “counteracting the gods of the court”, would be “the fight of your life”.
Fiona Barnett on August 27 2019 said:
Bond University Psychology professor BOB MONTGOMERY was charged with raping 3 boys and granted bail last February. He wrote numerous family court reports.
Bob Montgomery also received a rap over the knuckles from Queensland Psychology Board for having sex with a female patient.
Fiona did not cite her source for the information that Bob Montgomery received a rap over the knuckles from the Queensland Psychology Board. But I know she is an abuse survivor and an outspoken advocate for survivors, so she may perhaps have heard it directly from the female who Bob Montgomery sexually abused.
Can it get worse? Yes it can. In Australia, a man who has breached a domestic violence order against him can run a Children’s Contact Service where separated parents are court-ordered to go, to hand their children back and forth.
Father opens children’s contact service despite domestic violence order – Ashleigh Stevenson, ABCNews, April 24, 2019. Excerpt:
“I was absolutely shocked as to how someone with not only a domestic violence order against them, but also breaches as well, was able to be supervising other abusers,” Ms Penn said.
Australian Children’s Contact Services Association (ACCSA) spokesman Michael Cross said due to increasing demand there were lengthy wait lists to access these services, and privately run child contact services were flourishing.
Mr Cross estimated there were now between 85 and 100 private services across the country, outnumbering funded services.
He said unlike government-funded services, privately operated services were unregulated, and despite staff often having to deal with highly stressful, complex family disputes, they required no relevant qualifications or even blue card accreditation.
What is the so-called evangelical church doing about any of this?
A few evangelical groups are raising awareness about domestic abuse and putting pressure on denominations to deal with domestic abuse victims victims come forward and seek help from their churches.
But what are lobby groups like the Australian Christian Lobby, and micro political parties that purport to have Christian values, doing about the fiasco in the Family Court? In my observation, ZILCH. They focus on topics like abortion and same sex marriage. From long watching, long hearing from victims of domestic abuse, I can say that so-called Christian lobby groups have been infiltrated by domestic abusers and abuser-enablers.
Christian lobby groups are disseminating the typical rhetoric used by men who abuse their wives. “Divorce is always wrong. We must keep families together. All children need to have contact with their fathers. Feminism has wrecked the family, and the family unit is the foundation of society.”
FACEBOOK READERS: this is a reminder for your safety. If you are subject to family court orders or are in the process of litigation, please don’t write anything on Facebook (or here for that matter) that could identify you to your abuser or to the court. It could make your situation even more difficult.
If you want to comment here at the blog, we encourage you to do so, but we suggest you use a pseudonym and do not give any details that might identify you to others. Read our New Users page for tips about how to dis-identify your comments.
***
All mainstream media articles have been archived at web.archive.org/ so if the links above are scrubbed you can search for them there. I’ve taken a screen shot of Fiona Barnett’s statement, in case her FB account gets taken down.
Further reading
The Truth Behind Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS)
What is the best way to interact with an abuser when you have to? Shared parenting with an abuser.
A Cry For Justice 
I wasn’t sure which of the links to focus on! I read the first one that I hoped would give me a nice overview while of course NOT saying the rest of the links are superfluous.
I had so many thoughts running through my brain when I saw the topic. I was never in the court system as a child, and I don’t have kids of my own. So I am on the outside looking in.
But I do remember what it was like to be child, and feel unheard, unseen and unloved. Your sufferings are either treated as insignificant or inconvenient.
My “joke” when I got older was to claim that adults have ruined the world for kids. There are so many opportunities for adults to harm kids, who are just as human as adults, but generally smaller in size—-and therefore prime targets. We have little to no way of fighting back physically—–or legally.
That stood out to me. In school, if you are targeted and bullied—–this is how kids AND adults will treat you.
Instead of kids being allowed to be, well, kids—-we’re actually quite vulnerable. And as that article pointed out, we aren’t taken very seriously.
If you’ve ever been gossiped about, this will make perfect sense. Often you are being put on trial without getting a chance to either defend or explain yourself. The “court of public opinion” isn’t interested in facts—-yet it’s often those “verdicts” that carry the day.
This is what went through my head when it was pointed out how ridiculous it is to make decisions about:
I recall hearing how children are prone to lying, either due to a lack of maturity or a lack of an adult brain that “knows better.” I don’t know how true or not true that is—-but I think that is a dangerous oversimplification.
It’s obvious from the links you provided that adults, whether the parents or so-called professionals who are supposed to HELP families and children—-all of humanity is prone to AND capable of lying.
Why in the heck are children assumed to not be worth the time and effort to hear what they have to say, but adults are given huge platforms to not only be heard, but also exploit the very ones they are supposed to protect (the children)? But then it’s concluded that those very kids are too immature, too foolish, too untrustworthy to speak for themselves.
I’m sorry, but that is more of a description of the adults who are either indifferent, incapable and [or?] beyond untrustworthy.
Adult victims of abuse will talk about how their pain was dismissed as irrelevant, or that they were exaggerating, or straight up lying.
I make the case that kids AND adults know what pain is and isn’t. Kids may not be able to fully articulate what love is and isn’t (adults don’t have it all figured out, either!)—–but they know when they’re being treated in ways that do not express love.
Case examples in the USA came to mind as well. When law enforcement and police officers don’t work together, or have hostilities between them—-it is disastrous of epic proportions. We too have talked about “cracks” in the systems—-foster care, criminal and legal ones have all been accused of dysfunction.
The reasons why are likely extremely varied. Every state is different (as you mentioned, too). The bottom line is likely—-money. A lack of funding for those systems, or a lack of ability to pay for good legal representation, a lack of training for the professionals.
OR, a lack of heart. That is something money can’t buy. I am on board with good funding (no matter HOW much you care, if you don’t have the proper resources, all you can do is work with what you have and do your best).
This website has likely brought up a lack of training in the church to spot AND stop dangerous persons from preying on kids, or abuse in general.
I would have been terrified if adults around me had tried to report my being abused at home or bullied at school. I would have been terrified to be taken out of the only home I’d ever known, taken away from the only parents I’d ever known, and very much on my own in a “system” that may or may not care about me any more than my parents did.
At least my parents were “familiar” to me. Strangers inflicting harm on me is another ball game entirely.
I needed a safety net so I knew I had one, and so that I could endure home and school life with some level of sanity. So when it comes to the legal or foster system, that scared me more than the actual abuse!
So it’s complicated, right? There is more I don’t understand than what I do understand. And there wasn’t much I understood to begin with!
I’ll break up my comments for easier reading!
I had to Google this, but something called a “guardian ad litem” exists so that a minor child has a voice during certain proceedings involving the parents. This person is there to represent the child and think of the best interests of the child—-which the parents or family members may or may not be doing in the midst of court battles.
I recall a Pixar movie about a family of superheroes. At one point the mom chartered a plane to look for her husband. She had no idea he was in danger so she started to radio into the very place that was holding him hostage!
Her two kids had sneaked on board. When the bad guys tried to shoot the plane down, she shouted into the radio: “stop what you’re doing; there are children on board!”
That stayed with me. She had no idea why they were firing at her. So she made an appeal to their (hopeful) sense of humanity—-you’re putting children in danger. Whatever your reasons are for trying to shoot us down, there is no justification to hurt children.
I’ve tried to help adults with kids in the past and recent past. When it’s found out that I don’t have kids of my own, my “stock” tends to go down in the eyes of most parents.
Fine, get on your high horses if you must, although the Bible never claims that those that reproduce are superior to Him.
But what is ironic is that there have been times that those very adults have pushed my buttons and pushed me to the limit.
But I pray and pray to stick it out as long as He tells me to, because I don’t believe in punishing kids for what their parents are like.
I also believe that less stressed, more blessed parents will be better able to parent those kids. If the parents cross too many lines, I do bail out when I sense I’ve hit my limit.
These are private and personal beliefs; I only bring them up to illustrate how simple and frankly—-sensible it is to keep in mind that there are children on board. Stop with whatever agenda you have or don’t have—-and don’t fire on children no matter what.
I liked the phrase: “independent investigatory capacity.” If there is anything that is near impossible to remain objective about—–it is family and family matters. The ones on the inside are extremely limited in being able to see (OR acknowledge) the bigger picture. Many times they might completely forget or dismiss what they are fighting about, or who they are supposedly fighting for.
I married into a family in which divorce is rampant. Underneath all of that have been a lot confusion and complications—-and very few answers. From potential adultery to potential abuse, I sense the adults didn’t always keep the interests of the kids first and foremost.
Sometimes I think adults got “swept up” in what was going on and the kids just got caught in the middle. Other times I think the adults mandated a “code of silence” as a way to move forward, even though that actually made things worse.
The kids, who (surprise!) WILL grow into adults, tend to be forever impacted by divorce, as well as the division and dysfunction it can cause. It doesn’t always play out in a destructive manner, but imagine a meteor hitting the earth. Regardless of the size of a crater left behind, the impact is real and felt.
Kids, who did not have a voice when their worlds were falling apart, grow up whether we like it or not. You can’t say they’re too naive or too immature to know what’s going on forever. They will eventually figure out exactly who failed them, and who should be held responsible.
I’m not sure if adults are guaranteed to have a voice when they try to testify of their pain as youngsters. But hopefully they’ll be able to articulate that pain as adults in ways that their younger selves weren’t allowed to or able to.
I can’t imagine a child saying: “I deserve a voice so let me testify in court, or talk to a judge behind closed doors.” I can’t recall if I knew words like “testify” or “I know my rights” when I was so young.
But the links talking about those very persons IN that protect the child system, preying on children—–I understand why kids themselves, at no urging, maintain a code of silence. Also, adults have been known to remain indifferent to allegations of abuse. The victims from Larry Nassar have testified of this over and over again.
Absolutely. Here in America the issue of background checks in order to purchase and own guns is a hot button issue. I am unsure how things work in other countries, but I don’t believe there is a lot of research done to allow adults have access to kids—-depending on the venues. It may be mandated to do a background check, or it may be voluntary but “encouraged.” Which means it likely won’t happen?
I believe you’ve heard about how predators can leap from church to church without the previous churches warning other churches within their denomination? I believe it is the Southern Baptist [Convention], but check me on that please. The response is that the churches operate independently, not as one.
You know, I don’t always have to be TOLD to stop at an intersection with no stop sign. It’s just a good idea to slow down. In parking lots, drive slow and walk slow because not everyone is pro-safety or pro-people for that matter.
Even if there are stop signs, you don’t know if everyone else is on board with being told what to do. Does common sense HAVE to be mandated?
What is the worst is your last paragraph. Very little is being done. Abortion and same-sex marriage issues are so hot button in America as well. They are huge and VERY trigger happy in terms of getting worked up and riled up—-without much interest in working it out or working together—-or working at all. Getting worked up may let off self-righteous steam within, but it does nothing in terms of actual fruit of the Spirit—-100% based on His righteousness, which sadly seems to get “lost” in the discussion. When it should be the only thing that matters.
I still cannot wrap my head about ancient cultures that engaged in child sacrifice. My first thought is that the lives of children were meaningless to them.
That is true, so bear with me here. I recall listening to a pastor who explained that parents or adults would sacrifice their kids to idols as a way to expect big payback for such a huge sacrifice. A sacrifice on that level either guaranteed or put huge expectation on the “gods” to reward them, for how far and how high (or how low, in reality) they were willing to go in order to have their requests met. It was more a demand, because the sacrifice of kids demanded that their requests be granted.
In this twisted thinking applied to present day, it seems that agendas that promote the notion that you can’t make an omelette without breaking a few eggs—-are worth sacrificing the very people that God loves and died for. Or, the very ideals and persons that secular systems claim they care about.
Please keep writing and sharing. I really am shocked that this post didn’t get more traffic. It could be that they can’t share due to safety and protection issues.
Helovesme,
I read the original post and all the linked articles when the post was originally published. Unfortunately, I am still stuck in the hidey-hole into which I was triggered two or three weeks ago, so I am unable to communicate in what had become my usual (more explicit) style.
The only comment I could have posted at the time matches the title of a book:
YOUR comment, Helovesme, is FAR more explicit. 🙂
I’m sorry you are stuck in the hidey-hole, Finding Answers.
But I’m glad that Helovesme’s responses seem to be helping you, even if you can’t talk or write about it.
Adding this to you, Finding Answers — I am impressed that you read not only the original post but all the linked articles when it first came out. You are a dedicated reader! Not many people read in depth like that.
As I understand the US system (and I’m not an expert!) when child custody is contested the court appoints a GAL (Guardian Ad Litem [Internet Archive link]1) to supposedly represent the best interests of the child. But many protective parents say that GALs are not representing the child’s best interests. Instead, GALs very often recommend to the court that the abusive parent be given custody, or 50 – 50 parenting, or substantial visitation rights. Naturally, this always results in kids being abused by the abusive parent, and the protective parent being unable to protect the child properly. It is nightmare for the protective parents and the kids.
I strongly suspect that the despite all the rhetoric that family courts spout about ‘working for the best interests of the child’, the reality is that family courts are systems designed to hand children to abusers / predators / psychopaths.
One way this has been done is by training judges and GALs to believe Richard Gardiner’s junk science theory of “Parental Alienation”.
Richard Gardner not only endorsed pedophilia, he was probably a pedophile himself. I gave this link at the bottom of the post, but I’ll give it again here: The Truth Behind Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS).
Of course, not every child or protective parent is betrayed by the family court system, but many are.
Are family courts gender biased? Are they betraying protective mothers more than protective fathers? The following research paper is one of the contributions to that debate. It was recently published and you can download it for free. Child Custody Outcomes in Cases Involving Parental Alienation and Abuse Allegations [Internet Archive link]
1[June 20, 2022: We added the link to the Wikipedia page on Legal Guardian: Guardian ad litem. The Internet Archive link is a copy of that page. Editors.]
In Australia we have something similar to GALs, but we don’t call them GALs. In Australia, the Family Court of Australia sometimes appoints a solicitor to represent the child’s interests. That was what happened in my case when I went through the Family Court about 24 years ago.
Barb,
Where I live, I have heard of individuals with specialized training who do forensic interviews with children or adults with various communications issues. (Omitting details for my protection.)
Being a cynic in some areas though, I assume there is a wide range of expertise and / or integrity in the group of people who do forensic interviews.
BTW, I have bookmarked the PDF version of the research paper on Child Custody Outcomes for later reading. 🙂
It’s the same in Australia: we have individuals with specialized training who do forensic interviews with children or adults with various communications issues.
However, forensic interviews are done for crimes. The Family Court doesn’t deal with crimes – that’s one of the massive problems!
Hi, Barb, thank you more info about what the courts are like in Australia—a “solicitor” to supposedly represent the interests of the child SOUNDS great, but that doesn’t mean it works out as it should.
I have no personal knowledge of how a GAL works or doesn’t work in America. This is hard to keep saying—-but every state is different. This is true in the case of health care, for example, as well. So much depends on who is in charge, how much money is involved and (ouch) what is or isn’t advantageous to those in power.
It’s hard to know who really does and doesn’t care about justice. Barb has written wonderfully about abuse advocates whose hearts may (or may not) be in the right places, but their actions may (or may not) be problematic: you have to put the safety and interests of the victim (and kids, if that applies) above everything and anything else.
One of the testimonies from a young lady, in that first link, explained how she was asked if she loved her parents and she said “yes.” The courts (of all people) did not understand that an expression of love does not mean she is safe to LIVE with those parents.
I believe she meant it when she expressed a love for parents who were, in fact, not deserving of that love.
I also wonder what the reaction (and ruling) would have been if she had said that she hated her parents and never wanted to live with them again, much less ever see them again.
I had a diary growing up. I would express MANY emotions towards my abusive parents.
Perhaps when that young lady said she loved them, she in fact meant that she wanted to love them so badly, and wanted to be loved just as badly in return—-that she was willing to express those desires as if they were a reality—-even though it certainly was not.
A GAL who simply took this child’s word as fact would be unwise in doing so. Or, if that GAL tried to convince the child to ask to stay with her parents. If a GAL refuses to think like a child (to empathize with them), then why are they put in these positions?
Barb brought up that the interests of the parents (or “keeping the family together is in the best interest of the child”) might completely override what is truly in the best interests of the child.
Perhaps this is because it is STILL hard to imagine that certain parents just MIGHT not love their kids, and not care about keeping them safe and unharmed. Quite the opposite. They WANT to prey on their own flesh and blood.
When I read the testimonies of those two persons, I was reminded that these were their actual parents. We cannot seem to grasp that not all parents have or experience a strong, loving connection to their own offspring. There is not always that “natural” desire to protect and defend their offspring from harm. Again, it can be quite the opposite.
Listen, I can grasp that the church has a hard time grasping this. But the court is separate from the church. It’s imperative that they grasp this because they are making decisions based on faulty premises.
An adult who is a victim of abuse might stay silent because they know they will never see justice in a court of law. They know it’s a losing battle. They are up against powers that are simply bigger than them.
Sometimes I think kids are WAY smarter than we give them credit for—–I wonder if they instinctively pick up on this as well. When I was a child, not only was nearly everyone bigger than me physically, but they were much more powerful than me as well. They were the ones in charge. How could I know which one, if any one of them, would not use their “bigness” to defend and protect me, not exploit and crush me?
I commented (5TH SEPTEMBER 2019 – 1:16 PM):
I have been led out of my hidey-hole and I am once again able to communicate in the newer way(s) I have been learning (and fine tuning) work for me. 🙂
Helovesme commented (7TH SEPTEMBER 2019 – 11:40 AM):
^That.
In the same comment, Helovesme commented:
^That.
In the same comment, Helovesme commented:
^That.
In the same comment, Helovesme commented:
The child would have been told (to quote the psychiatric community) that she (the child) was “lacking insight”.
In the same comment, Helovesme commented:
^THAT could apply to ANYONE in the court system.
In the same comment, Helovesme commented:
^That.
In the same comment, Helovesme commented:
^That.
In the same comment, Helovesme commented:
^THAT!
In the same comment, Helovesme commented:
^That.
Hope it’s okay to take a page out of your playbook, Finding Answers!
You commented:
THAT!
I didn’t want to answer my own musing only because I’ve never been in the court system. I didn’t want to presume to even guess what the reaction might have been.
But I think that is a good and very strong, very likely insightful possibility.
When I say this, it is NOT to mock the real the court system.
I was badly bullied throughout most of my school years. In the “court” of adolescence, it is the weak who not only “deserve” to get targeted, but are also faulted for being weak if they dare to take it personally.
Do you go to the adults, who might ALSO fault you for being not only targeted, but weak because you chose to not fight your own battles, but dared to ask for outside help?
OR, do the adults take care of the problem by separating YOU from those kids? (This happened to me in middle school when gym class became unbearable for me.) I was given the task of sitting all alone in a classroom as a teacher’s aide, grading papers.
And you know what? I was more than happy with this outcome. It was not only until many years later, that I wondered why in the heck I was isolated as I was. The bullies paid no price and their only “loss” is that they had no target to pick on.
Perhaps, however, gym class went more smoothly without me there. Once the “disruption” was removed, there were no more “disruptions!”
In the actual legal system, perhaps this same “model” might apply. The one getting hurt (aka the child) is the problem. He or she is being “disruptive” by daring to admit that they’re being hurt, and would like to stop being hurt.
Well, if you DO admit this, you’ll be isolated. Alone. The parents will fight over you, about you and in front of you (in the legal system as well as at home).
For the “family” to proceed smoothly, you have to stop being so “disruptive.” You’re breaking up the family unit by crying out.
I also had many problems getting bullied on the school bus. When I went to my guidance counselor about that, thankfully he said he’d call in one of the main bullies and talk to him. I DO think things got better on the bus after that, and thankfully so, because if you took me off the bus, how was I going to get to school? My mom would have to drive me back and forth, and that would not have gone over well. I would have been a “disruption” at home.
Perhaps, if kids are still the same today as it was for me—-we’re so afraid of being labeled, unfairly or otherwise, as “disruptive,” that we’d rather stay quiet than dare to “inconvenience” everyone around us.
Not only that, but the shame (completely undeserved) in coming forward, admitting I was being bullied to the point of unbearable pain—-is beyond words. You not only feel ashamed for coming forward, but it’s likely only more shame will be heaped on you for not being able to tolerate the so-called intolerable pain.
Interesting, right? I’m still a CHILD. At a certain point, no, I likely don’t burst into tears as easily as when I was say——a toddler. But does that mean that I have no visible reactions to pain, ever?
This isn’t even true for adults! Believe me, as an [in my 40s] adult—-I have had very strong and visible reactions to both bodily and internal pain.
[For safety and protection, the age has been airbrushed. Editors.]
Helovesme commented (7TH SEPTEMBER 2019 – 4:44 PM):
NOT ^That if the adults are part of the problem.
In the same comment, Helovesme commented:
NOT ^That if the adults are part of the problem.
Based on the original post, the articles linked to from the original post, and the research paper “Child Custody Outcomes in Cases Involving Parental Alienation and Abuse Allegations” linked to in Barb’s comment, it would appear adults ARE the problem.
Nailed it!
When does Bob Montgomery’s case return to court, please?
Hi, Anon 58 — I do not know when Bob Montgomery’s case returns to court.
I will ask some people (victim advocates) I know, but the people I ask may not know the answer to your question.
I suggest you ask Byron Bay Courthouse, NSW, Australia.
I am guessing you are in Australia, Anon 58.
I did a bit of digging. Here are the contact details I found for the Byron Bay Courthouse if you are in Australia —
Phone: (02) 6685 6585
Fax: (02) 6685 6654
Email: local-court-byron-bay@justice.nsw.gov.au
Street Address: Middleton Street, BYRON BAY NSW 2481
Postal Address: PO Box 70, BYRON BAY NSW 2481hone:(02) 6685 6585
Fax: (02) 6685 6654
Email: local-court-byron-bay@justice.nsw.gov.au
Street Address: Middleton Street, BYRON BAY NSW 2481
Postal Address: PO Box 70, BYRON BAY NSW 2481