[August 14, 2022: There have been some changes made to this post. For more information, read the Editors’ notes at the bottom of the post. Editors.]
Psalm 119:121-136 (ESV)
121 I have done what is just and right;
do not leave me to my oppressors.
122 Give your servant a pledge of good;
let not the insolent oppress me.
123 My eyes long for your salvation
and for the fulfillment of your righteous promise.
124 Deal with your servant according to your steadfast love,
and teach me your statutes.
125 I am your servant; give me understanding,
that I may know your testimonies!
126 It is time for the LORD to act,
for your law has been broken.
127 Therefore I love your commandments
above gold, above fine gold.
128 Therefore I consider all your precepts to be right;
I hate every false way.129 Your testimonies are wonderful;
therefore my soul keeps them.
130 The unfolding of your words gives light;
it imparts understanding to the simple.
131 I open my mouth and pant,
because I long for your commandments.
132 Turn to me and be gracious to me,
as is your way with those who love your name.
133 Keep steady my steps according to your promise,
and let no iniquity get dominion over me.
134 Redeem me from man’s oppression,
that I may keep your precepts.
135 Make your face shine upon your servant,
and teach me your statutes.
136 My eyes shed streams of tears,
because people do not keep your law. [Emphasis added.]
Psalm 119 — the longest psalm in the Bible — has been dubbed “God’s Word on God’s Word”. Isn’t it beautiful that in the midst of this long encomium on the many splendours of God’s precepts, we find a word for the oppressed.
Please share what this passage brings up for you, if you wish.
[August 14, 2022: Editors’ notes:
—For some comments made prior to August 14, 2022 that quoted from the post, the text in the comment that was quoted from the post might no longer be an exact match.
—For some comments made prior to August 14, 2022 that quoted from the post, the text in the comment that was quoted from the post might no longer be found in the post.
If you would like to compare the text in the comments made prior to August 14, 2022 that quoted from the post to the post as it is now (August 14, 2022), click here [Internet Archive link] for the most recent Internet Archive copy of the post.]
A Cry For Justice 
While giving acknowledgement to God as supreme and ommiscient and trusting Him to work in our behalf, it also expresses that it is ok to have negative emotions. It takes prayer and time to process through them. “Be ye angry and sin not.”
Throughout Psalms we see even David pouring out his emotion and pain. In a couple of Psalms we even see David pleading for vindication, AND that he be able to see it.
Thank God for Psalms!
Even though, “136 My eyes shed streams of tears, because people do not keep your law.”
I know, “129 Your testimonies are wonderful; therefore my soul keeps them.”
Thus, “127 Therefore I love your commandments above gold, above fine gold.”
“128 Therefore I consider all your precepts to be right; I hate every false way.”
This passage….is particularly meaningful today.
I was a mess mentally, socially, spiritually, after the end of decades of abuse in all those areas. My abuser was gone, but my mind was still enslaved and unhealed. I took numerous medications to control anxiety and depression, which needed more medications to counteract side effects. A friend exhorted me to “go to the Word, spend time there, get your mind renewed.”
I listened to Bible teaching and Bible tapes non-stop and within 2 years was off all medications, and have been free of that since 2007. I am far more emotionally steady, less anxious and more joyful than I imagined possible. The Word wasn’t second best for help, it was the best. God promises that if His word remains in us He remains in us. I am far more aware of God’s help and presence than I was before an effort to make the Bible a priority in my life.
This:
As the last post read, the abuser is intentional in the plot to hurt his target. In contrast, God is intentional to do His children GOOD, not harm! I find my comfort in His promises to His beloved and His all-knowing rule and oversight over the affairs of mankind!
vs 136 ‘My eyes shed streams of tears,
because people do not keep your law’.
vs 126 ‘It is time for the Lord to act,
for your law has been broken’.
My eyes have shed many, many tears but I know that the Lord will act because His law has been broken.
I am suffering so deeply. My eyes have been shedding streams of tears tonight. I do pant. I HATE every false way. Let no dominion take over me. Justice!!! I want justice!!! Save me! Protect me! I want a healthy life!!! I want to be free! I have children that the abuser forced me to have. I love my children. The abuser forced me to have them because it was his plan to control me THROUGH them. He FORCED me to get pregnant. The abuser has controlled through the kids since pregnancy!. Tonight I suffer in realizing the depth of the abuse. So much has gone on. Such deception and constant fog. I couldn’t see what he was REALLY doing. I COULDNT SEE!!!! I cried out and NO ONE LISTENED TO ME!!! He faked so much and so often and to so many that I myself was extremely confused.
Now I do suffer greatly for doing what is right. For having sight I suffer greatly. The tears won’t stop. I just want help!!! I want justice. I want God to save me from this terror fear and abuse!!!!
But because I have children the abuser will forever torment me thru them. I have no way out. He’s going to destroy my life and my relationship with the kids as long as he lives. I can’t take the abuse I get from the kids. They exalt the abuser and scream at me.
I need comfort and help. I need love and help. I have no money. I need God’s justice and help! I hate the injustice. I hate the PAIN. I hate the lies that the abuser pushed. The lies that I couldn’t see clearly and believed and the lies that I could see and did fight. I hate the deception.
I want God to rescue me and I want NEVER to forget Him, His law and His justice. I want to fight for other survivors! I want to comfort them and pay for their things the way I need that help now!!!! I want to never let a comment or action go by that degrades and abuses women (or men.) without standing up for the truth and doing what is right . I want to live with integrity and fight for the oppressed!!!!!! I want to live an to tell the truth!
Lost, you said
The pain of the protective parent when their abuser has effectively turned the kids against her (or him) is something I only know a bit of. I certainly experienced some of it myself, but I haven’t experienced nearly as much of it as some other survivors have.
I say that first, because I want you to know that I scarcely dare offer you any suggestions.
But, (and toss it out if it doesn’t help) I think George Simon’s latest book How Did We End Up Here? [Affiliate link] may give you some ideas for how to correct and re-shape your children’s behaviour towards you. I certainly think that their ongoing abuse of you is playing a big part in how you are feeling.
You may not be able to turn them around – and sometimes, like in my case, the protective parent’s efforts don’t work, but in time God brings the estranged child around in His own inimitable and beautiful way…. but you may be able to correct and discipline them wisely so that they are less outrageous towards you, if not totally repentant about their unjust attitudes and behaviors.
Just a thought.
Hi Lost, I do believe the day will come when you will be fighting for other victims as I have been greatly encouraged by many of your posts.
I too have walked the road of dispair that you are describing and know that lonely and painful realization and seperation from the family concerted abuse.
My abusive husband also manipulated my situtation by turning my own children against me.
He found ways of giving the children favorable treatment, when they complied with his punishment of shunning me, and punished them if they stood up for me, or behaved in any type of supporting manner towards me.
It didnt take long for them to become HIS “Stepford Children”.
But I kept in mind that the children were “confused as to what was going on” even though they actively supported him.
They knew if they went along with everything he wanted, then life would be well for them. But if they dared to be nice to me or talk to me, and he caught it, then they would later have some unfortunate incident happen to them by him.
So for self preservation reasons, the children would comply with the one who could inflict damage to their life of peace, if they stepped out of his line..
I understood this and knew this was a forced “survival coping reaction for the children..
But several times I admit my situtation “Seemed” as if I had been treated like a female dog, who just welped out a batch of pups only to never connect with them again, and that was a painful thought.
BUT…. That I realized was only an appearance..
It has been over 6 months since I’ve moved away from having to operate within the abusers “FOG Producing Environment”, and my confidence and personhood has returned.
I was able to litigate the divorce to a place of a final 4 hour ADR with a pro temp Judge, in 2 seperate rooms where things went incredibly well for me, and was able to work out visitation with the children with a reasonable notice or 24 hour text to indicate that I want to visit on that day.
Since the 2 minor children are now in their teens, and I could not afford a place of my own, I let them stay with their father as the primary caretaker, although we both have joint legal decision making.
I just visit them and bring them their favorite food or drink, and we talk in my vehicle or go somewhere on my days off.
After my visits, I can tell the boys have a better sence of “who they are”, and their moral is improved, because I am actively validating their abilities and accomplishments.
(something their abuser does NOT do.)
God can work with the small provisions that we have. Dont lose heart, your children will need you, and realize it in time, they just dont know it yet.
Now that your children are being forced to be alone with the abuser, it will only be a matter of time before the abuser shows his “true ugly colors”, where the children will be wanting visits from you.
Remember God can and will work through you with any situtation.
Greater is He that is in you, than he that is in the world.
Eliminating the “not me” voices in my head, discerning between permanently damaged areas of my life and those in which I am fully functional, is not something I can do alone. I am relearning how to live life, learning how to live with aspects of myself that render me susceptible to misunderstanding (by others, by me).
I need the Holy Spirit to guide me, to fill in the blank spaces with His direction.
Standsfortruth commented:
Adding on to my own comment….
Standsfortruth commented:
A Prodigal Daughter Returns commented:
I commented:
^That.
When I wrote my original comment last October, I was still missing many pieces of my puzzle. While much has changed in my understanding, the consequences of living all my life in abusive relationships remain with me.
In learning to depend on God, in living my life with my hand in His, the consequences of living all my life in abusive relationships are becoming increasingly evident – the daily triggers, the increasing sensitivity to the environment around me, the recognition of the lies upon which my life was based.
It’s odd. I am stronger, yet more aware of my limitations.
Perhaps, in a VERY small way, I can relate to the Son of God who became the Son of man.
I need to keep my eyes on Him.