A Cry For Justice

Awakening the Evangelical Church to Domestic Violence and Abuse in its Midst

Abusers and Social Media — You Can’t fool Christ With Your Online Facade

UPDATE Sept 2021: I have come to believe that Jeff Crippen does not practise what he preaches. He vilely persecuted an abuse victim and spiritually abused many other people in the Tillamook congregation. Go here to read the evidence. Jeff has not gone to the people that he spiritually and emotionally abused. He has not apologised to them, let alone asked for their forgiveness.

***

“Hurling. Hurling now!” That is what a friend of mine texted me in response to an interchange I shared with her from Facebook between people that we know for a fact are unrepentantly walking in sin, yet who persist in pushing their “saintly” FB image down our throats. You know the drill. They quote Bible verses. They post little prayers. Yeah. Hurling. Hurling now.

Facades, disguises, and masquerades are all very familiar to those of us who know abusers. It is the very nature of evil to disguise itself. Righteousness never needs to do so. Remember, evil people love to wear sheep’s clothing, but sheep do not put on a wolf disguise.

2 Corinthians 11:13-15  For such men are false apostles, deceitful workmen, disguising themselves as apostles of Christ.  And no wonder, for even Satan disguises himself as an angel of light.  So it is no surprise if his servants, also, disguise themselves as servants of righteousness. Their end will correspond to their deeds.

Jesus knows all about these online phonies. He sees right through the mask.  In fact, EVERY time one of these wicked ones posts a Scripture or expounds about how much they love Jesus, they are in fact storing up wrath for themselves on that Day. I wonder if Christ will put their FB timelines up for all to see? They blaspheme. They take the Lord’s name in vain, even when they say “Praise the Lord!”

I bet our readers have some stories to tell about how their abuser practiced/practices this very thing. The wicked use all kinds of tools, including social media, to win their allies and turn them against the victim. It is vital for us to be wise and to immerse ourselves in the Word of God so that we do not get taken in by these deceptions. Remember, people can “be” whoever they want to be online. To them, Jesus will say:

Matthew 7:20-23  Thus you will recognize them by their fruits. Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.’

One final thought. Let me suggest this principle:

Righteous, genuine, safe people do not spend their energy telling everyone how godly they are. The wicked, in contrast, spend lots of time telling us about all the “good” works they are doing for Jesus. They often are the most energetic (visibly) “servants” in the church. But they are like the Pharisees who loved to have great fanfare when they put some money in the offering plate or when they stood on the street and prayed.

Therefore, be wise and learn. People who talk about all that they do in the Lord’s name, who flood their FB page with Bible quotes and “God-talk,” are in many cases probably phonies.

12 Comments

  1. Ang

    Yes, you hit the nail on the head!

  2. Brenda R

    I think it is far more rewarding to keep good works between yourself and God. Such a greater reward and no chance of being phony.

  3. ruthie050573

    How do we know the difference between someone truly evil and someone who is an abuser because they’ve been abused, ie unwilling or unable to deal with their past? I have been expose recently to many disordered individuals – one n particular can make no long term attachments because of orphanage and abuse. She hurts others by abandoning those who love her. She’s deeply traumatized and broken. I have compassion on her and those she is hurting. However, I have others I know who have covertly manipulated and emotionally abused me…including a smear campaign that landed me in ongoing therapy for C-PTSD …my abuse from childhood was used against me in a wicked way and was also triggered by two unrepentant N’s…they have beautiful facades full of scripture, songs, bible studies and a mass following that worship them. So how do I truly know their hearts in this? Maybe they were triggered by me setting boundaries and it sent them to a bad place feeling abandonment. I don’t know. I just know they are blocked on my phone and email and social media. I recognize unhealthiness and toxic patterns, but really wonder if they are wounded believers that the enemy can use more easily or if the people are truly evil at heart.

    • Valerie

      Ruthie, I think you hit the nail on the head when you recognize the first woman as being broken. Those who persist in evil and wickedness have not been broken. They refuse to be broken.

      I have tried to comfort cats who have been traumatized. These cats often huddle in the corner and they hiss at you when you try to come closer. But you realize from their disposition they are doing this out of terror. They are attempting to protect themselves. They will run or find a place to hide before they attack. Their eyes say “please don’t hurt me, I’m scared”. Their eyes dart for a way out of their situation.

      On the other hand there are pit bulls who attack because they enjoy blood. They enjoy attacking because they enjoy the fight and will provoke in order to accomplish their inner drive. They don’t do this to protect themselves- fighting is option A, not B. Their eyes say “bring it on…I dare ya. I will leave as the victor!”

      There’s the saying “hurt people hurt people”. They hurt as a response in a defensive way, not in an offensive way. Those who scripture deems as evil are the pit bulls who look for a way to throw around their dominance. The offensive type is also typically manipulative in their MO to gain an advantage.

      I can’t help but think that perhaps our hearts even know the difference. We feel sorrow and pity for the wounded who hurt others but our instinct tells us to stay clear away from those who hurt others for the sake of hurting.

      • Ang

        Valerie, you referred to “pit bulls who attack because they enjoy blood.”
        That is what I experienced at the church I left. I was naive and and vulnerable. The elders, pastors, leadership saw the opportunity to take advantage of a widow that needed help and they seized that opportunity.
        Since then, I see how the “pit bulls who attack” seem to group together and cover for each other. And they run in packs.
        None of us are perfect. But most people aren’t expecting to have to be on guard when walking into a church building. We think the robbers and thieves are somewhere else.

      • ruthie

        Yes! I’ve actually had the pitbull type say “bring it on” to one person specifically and then more reserved of course with someone else. Part of the facade and ever-changing mask. You are right about brokenness, but even that can be faked…

      • yes, and as well as pit bulls, there are cobras. They dont’ display the ‘bring it on’ bellicosity, they may just lie curled in a neat coil, silently, then suddenly and unexepectedly lash out and dig in their fangs. And two minutes later they are coiled in the sun again as if nothing had happened.

    • IamMyBeloved's

      “How do we know the difference between someone truly evil and someone who is an abuser because they’ve been abused, ie unwilling or unable to deal with their past?”

      Let me say this gently. I think the problem I am having with this statement, is that it gives a license to anyone who has been abused, to abuse others. There are millions of women who have been sexually abused in childhood, who do not abuse. There are also tons of men who were abused physically as children, who do not abuse their wives and/or children. I’m not really certain how to view this.

      The Bible does say that we can know someone’s heart, per se, because it tell us that such wicked thoughts and actions come from the heart of a person. The Bible also tells us how to determine someone who is saved and in Christ, or not. So, with that information, which is always truth, I would have to question the statement whether all abuser’s are evil, or just some. My own opinion would be that all abusers are acting out of evil, not just repeating behaviors. Besides, if someone is abusing and really doesn’t want to, they would go for help on their own and stay away from those they were abusing, until they were truly changed. I believe that everyone knows right from wrong, just like a 2 year old knows it is wrong to lie or steal. I cannot imagine that someone doesn’t know it is wrong to abuse, but I could be wrong.

    • Valerie

      Barbara, YES! The cobra is another perfect example. How I wish I had no idea what you were talking about. 😦

  4. StandsWithAFist

    Oh, my, but this hit home. Hurling, indeed! After exposing not one abuser, but two (including a stalker) due to the exploitation of social networking, the entire family came out of hell just to spew more abuse, all while saying the platitudes & cliches of so-called loving Christians while benefiting the abuser, not the abused. We pushed back..hard… and haven’t heard from them in over a year. We have been smeared, “unfriended” [horrors!], slandered, maligned and marginilised….thanks to fb, etc. If it’s an “alternate reality” they want, then fb and all the other sites are there, waiting with ‘thumbs up’ duplicity. It is a cyber-space fantasy. I will take real friends over cyberspace any day of the week and twice on Sunday. (Altho, I must say it DOES make for an interesting study of character, integrity and unabashed narcissism.) The cyber-stalker has since died, but I am not going back, b/c I am still hurling.

  5. Valerie

    There is so much truth in this statement:
    “Righteous, genuine, safe people do not spend their energy telling everyone how godly they are.”

    There is also a lot of food for thought when you say: “They take the Lord’s name in vain, even when they say ‘Praise the Lord!'” This is the very point that is so disturbing to me when my husband has remained on church leadership, quoting verses to others, all the while abusing, deceiving and manipulating. It reminds me of Jesus telling the demons to be silent when they were actually exclaiming he was the Son of God. Again in Acts when Paul silenced the girl with the spirit who was going around yelling that these people were telling them how to be saved. How is that a bad thing some would question? I’ve heard it said that if you are on trial for bank robbery, you don’t want another bank robber to be testifying of your good character. That kind of “testimony” does more harm than good.

    • They take the Lord’s name in vain, even when they say ‘Praise the Lord!’ . . . It reminds me of Jesus telling the demons to be silent when they were actually exclaiming he was the Son of God. Again in Acts when Paul silenced the girl with the spirit who was going around yelling that these people were telling them how to be saved

      great connection, Valerie! Thank you!

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