A Cry For Justice

Awakening the Evangelical Church to Domestic Violence and Abuse in its Midst

In Defense of R-Rated Blog Articles

UPDATE Sept 2021: I have come to believe that Jeff Crippen does not practise what he preaches. He vilely persecuted an abuse victim and spiritually abused many other people in the Tillamook congregation. Go here to read the evidence. Jeff has not gone to the people that he spiritually and emotionally abused. He has not apologised to them, let alone asked for their forgiveness.


Joshua 7:13-26 Get up! Consecrate the people and say, ‘Consecrate yourselves for tomorrow; for thus says the LORD, God of Israel, “There are devoted things in your midst, O Israel. You cannot stand before your enemies until you take away the devoted things from among you.” 

I wanted to address an issue that I believe has been flying under our abuse-detection radar for a long, long time and still is.  Most of our readers know very well that people, and one might say “especially” Christian people, do not want to hear the ugly details about abuse.  Most victims have seen the blank look when the subject is broached.  Well, guess what? When the subject is sexual abuse, the blank look and fidgeting intensifies.  All of this is working to the advantage of the abuser, the child molester, and other practitioners of evil.  Silence protects the wicked.

At the first part of this month, Barbara Roberts posted an article about sexual abuse as practiced upon victims of domestic abuse.  She told her story and quite a number of you did as well.  Details were graphic.  The ugliness of this evil was clearly portrayed.  Those of you who told your story let us in on the horrific things you suffered.  One person was so incensed that all of this was wrong that they raised a clamor and broke off all contact with us, accusing us of leading people into sin and destroying marriages.  I am still trying to figure that last allegation out.  She insists that any godly pastor would never listen to such graphic details of abuse, but only needs the generalities.

These kinds of darts sting.  We don’t like to lose any of our blog community and we want to do all we can to help victims.  We lose sleep over these kinds of allegations and sometimes we launch into a spiral of introspection that only brings us lower. Most of you know what those darts are like.

But after considering these criticisms, I am writing this article to defend the posting of the details of abuse, including sexual abuse.  Could some of our commenters perhaps get a bit “common” in their language sometimes?  Yes.  But we don’t try to control every syllable that is posted here.  And sometimes that kind of language is the only kind that describes the horror of what has happened to these people.  Perhaps no one has ever given them the opportunity to tell what their abuser did to them.  So it pours out.

Our critic claims that such stories will incite sinful lust in other readers, especially men.  Well, I am a man, and I can tell you what these accounts incite in me – ANGER!  If any man finds them titillating, then that is a man who has bigger problems than he realizes.  Sexual abuse is not about sex!  It is about power and control and shaming evil in one of its worst forms.  So if anyone’s reaction to these stories is to be offended by the graphic nature of the facts exposed, then here is an illustration for you –

“One time a pastor was so discouraged at the long-standing apathy in his congregation that he opened his sermon up with this line”  “You people don’t give a damn about Christ, about the lost, and about the need to take the gospel to them!  And I will prove it!  Right now, most of you are more shocked and concerned that I used the word ‘damn’ than about the fact that the great commission is not being carried out by us as our Lord has commanded!”  (Can you hear the dead silence?)

You see, what these stories from these victims ought to incite from us is ANGER and RAGE over the evil people who have done these terrible things to these poor victims.  But when we are more concerned about the “offensiveness” to our sensibilities than we are caught up in compassion for the victims and righteously angry at the perpetrator, then something is gone very wrong in us.

One of the reasons that abuse, including and perhaps especially sexual abuse, is tolerated and enabled in our churches, is because no one wants to hear about it.  And they sure don’t want to hear about it in detail.  But how is the church, how are Christians and pastors and church elders ever going to see this evil for what it is as long as we refuse to hear about it and as long as we keep telling victims to shut up about it?  We are like courtrooms where a rape trial is being heard, but the Judge keeps saying that neither he nor the jury want to hear any graphic details of what the rapist did to the victim.  What would happen?  Do you think justice would be done?  Of course not.

Abuse is not pretty.  Sexual abuse can offend our sensibilities and in many ways, it should.  But this is all the more reason to lay it right out there in the light where everybody can see just exactly what horrible evil is going on “in the camp” of the church.  Achan’s stolen silver needed to be dug up out of his tent, he needed to be found out, and all Israel needed to hear from him exactly what he had done.  The holiness of our Lord Jesus Christ demands it.


  1. Jeff Crippen

    Morven – let us know how the congregation reacted. I would be particularly interested in hearing from you what different kinds of responses you get. I have only had opportunity to speak on abuse to 3 other groups besides my own church. I would love to be able to do more.

    • Well, my dear friends, I think that all of Creation was praying because the response at BOTH services was incredible. Men and women, old and young, lined up to repent – yes, you heard that right – repent, tell me their stories (the two elderly ladies telling me they had been raped just broke my heart), ask for help for themselves and their families, admitted generational sins and LISTENED. Yes, there were plenty who refused to interact with me with eye contact. One man I know actually sat in the back row, put his head back and shut his eyes and crossed his arms in defiance the entire service! One man at the second service kept turning his back to me; I think it was a combination of anger and shame, because occasionally I’d catch him ‘peeking’ and looking at the slides. What broke my heart, however, was the reality that there are hardly any groups for these men who 1) were molested as children 2) became sexual addicts as a result and 3) want to change the way they treat their families. I even said that Adam and Eve were BOTH responsible for the original sin (God told Adam about the tree before Eve was even created and was with her when the decision to eat was made and never tried to stop her) and the response to THAT was amazing. The guys looked stunned, as in “I’ve never heard that before”, their pastor said “amen” loudly and a woman said out loud, “finally, mutual responsibility for this mess.” I talked about how to get back to the Garden using the domestic violence/equality ‘wheels’ available online and ended with 1 Cor 13, the best definition of what real love looks like. AND ….. they want me back within a few weeks to do a morning workshop!!! I could not have done it without your supportive prayer and encouragement. Thank you, dear ones. Blessings, M

      • Oh Morven! That is wonderful!! Thank you for posting an update-

      • Stupendous, riveting news. I thank God for this, and for bringing us together Morven. Your counseling perspective is invaluable.
        Some things especially stand out for me:

        1. “There are hardly any groups for these men who 1) were molested as children 2) became sexual addicts as a result and 3) want to change the way they treat their families.
        Here is an enormous ministry field, an enormous need …. and so few have the capacity to respond to the need.

        2. “I even said Adam and Eve were BOTH responsible for the original sin … The guys looked stunned, as in “I’ve never heard that before”, their pastor said “amen” loudly and a woman said out loud, “finally, mutual responsibility for this mess.”
        These three widely divergent perspectives must come from years of having failed to communicate and listen to each other! Church, we have work to do!

        3. “how to get back to the Garden using the domestic violence/equality ‘wheels’ ”
        Yes! The secular teaching on Domestic Violence interfaces and fits congruently with the Biblical worldview much more than we often realize. And when we explain this to open-minded Christians, the penny drops, nay, the pennies and dollars cascade in joyful waterfalls of realization.

      • cindy burrell

        Praise God! Let the truth be shouted from the mountaintops! The truth shall set us free!

      • Thank you, Cindy! I appreciate your prayers and support.

  2. I have been accused of being too hard on men in general, lumping them all into one big pot and calling it naughty but, honest to goodness, the thought that those testimonies would ever incite lust never crossed my mind! I’m having a real hard time believing any normal man would be affected that way by those accounts.

    Just call me Pollyanna and put me in the man-loving column with this one.

  3. KayE

    Please please don’t lose any more sleep over criticisms like that.I suspect that for every person who is offended there are probably many more who are helped by knowing they are not alone in their suffering.Those stories made me upset and angry too, but I always think that the ugly truth is better than a beautiful lie.Sometimes it’s really important to hear the details.
    There seems to be a widespread belief among church leaders that abuse victims are just complaining about nothing, and they do need to hear the harsh truth. I’m sure these aren’t even the worst stories out there.

    • Jeff Crippen

      Thanks much Kay. That is really good – “the ugly truth is better than a beautiful lie.” Very encouraging to us.

    • Anon

      Yes, KayE, I agree with you. Everything about abuse is ugly. This is nothing new that people just can’t handle it. We don’t ever tell the worst of our stories, not even to our close friends. But in order to heal, we need to. Re-telling our stories is key to recovering, not just because Judith Herman argues it in “Trauma and Recovery” but because psychiatrists note that our right and left brains need to re-connect in order to integrate ourselves. Neuroscientist Daniel Siegel advocates this for parenting our children in The Whole Brain Child: ” ..stories empower us to move forward and master the moments when we feel out of control.” So how can we do it with our children when we don’t even practice it ourselves?

  4. Pray for me as I present much of what is above and more to a brave congregation at two services tomorrow. Imagine, a woman speaking from the pulpit on how God intended sex to be in the garden, how shame and patriarchy came into being because of BOTH Adam and Eve’s disobedience, how patriarchy continues to perpetuate abuse in many Christian homes and how Jesus came as the “second Adam” to restore dignity to women, to bring equality to men and women in Christ and to, once again, restore the partnership began in the Garden. The noise you hear are my patriarchal deceased relatives rolling in their graves!!

    • Elizabeth Kraus

      Go get ’em!

    • Anon

      Well, that’s a departure from a womens seminar I once attended, where the male speaker (the only male in the room) told us that men need sex and that Christians can never say No. Oh, there was some glib “obviously there are exceptions” but there was no description of what these exceptions were. I think that two thirds of those who elected to go to that talk were looking for answers to the sexual abuse they were experiencing. They left empty-handed. No, actually, they left with more ammunition to detonate themselves with.

  5. Morven, you are a brave, brave woman 🙂

    • Thank you, Barbara and Ida Mae. Today was hard, and I know there will be fall out because some people may have misunderstood my comments, or definitely did get them, as I was strongly emphasizing the connection of patriarchy as part of the consequences of the sin of BOTH Adam and Eve from the garden. Patriarchy was never God’s design – it was partnership, and when the second Adam, Jesus, came and restored dignity to women, Paul made it clear in his words that “there is no Jew or Gentile, slave nor free, male or female, we are ALL one in Christ Jesus.” Equality is the complete opposite of Patriarchy, and the Patriarchy corner is where I will start feeling the nasty comments from. But, “bring ’em on” …. I grew up in such a denomination, so I am well prepared. Besides, I have my prayer warriors covering me from Australia to Timbuktu. Bless you and the rest of the team.

  6. Louise McOrmond-Plummer

    Barb, thank you so much for pointing me to this, and Pastor Crippen, thank you from the bottom of my heart for taking a stand. I know many Christian survivors who will be enlivened by this. It is precisely people who do not want to hear about sexual abuse that drives victims further underground and ensures that danger to them continues. If the grim details are difficult to read or hear, they are much much more difficult for women to endure, especially when people treat them as if they are dirty for saying these things. I do hope no woman who shared her story feels judged or shamed by harsh and ignorant words. As Barb says, I do have a site containing survivor stories, and yes, there’s always concerns about the wrong sort of people reading them. This is the net; all types abound here. The fact of the matter is that despite perverted types who trawl the net looking for rape stories, the right type of people – those who desperately need the commonality this sharing provides – are also reading and that matters far more. If women are silent because men might be titillated by their stories, this is just more women being asked to be responsible for, and be silent in the face of, those men’s sexual behaviour. Thank you a million times again, Pastor Crippen. I am off to share this link with people I know will appreciate it.

    • Thanks, Louise! 🙂

      • Louise McOrmond-Plummer

        …And Pastor Crippen, you are so right about that blank look. Another common look survivors of sexual violence commonly get is the “Eww! Gross!” look, that seems so judgment-laden and is just so hard to see. I have often said that with respect to rape, people you talk to about it often act as if you’re showing them what you found up your nose. This, I think, was articulated beautifully by your disgruntled correspondent.

  7. Not long after I wrote that post about sexual abuse, I rang a friend in Australia who has a website that offers help and support for survivors of intimate partner sexual abuse:- rape within marriage, and suchlike stuff. This lady, Louise McOrmond Plummer – you can see her comments on that post – said she believes it is NOT wrong to let survivors put their stories online at survivor support sites. On her site, some of the survivor stories are a bit graphic in places. And yeah, it may be possible for a perverted abuser to find titillation from them, but the value of letting survivors share freely and obtain support from each other (“I’m not alone!”) far outweighs the potential negatives of what a few sick people might derive from the stories.

    Besides, in the big scheme of things, an article like my post on sexual abuse, or a site like Louise’s, are scarcely adding a drop to the ocean of sexually explicit material that is already out there on the internet.

    On a risk-benefit analysis, I think what has been written by myself and others on that sexual abuse post comes out far higher in Benefits than it does in Risks.

    Some may argue that these kinds of stories should only be online in password protected sites. I’m open to that argument, but I’m not sure whether it convinces me yet. I would be interested to hear what others think (so long as we all remain polite!)

    BTW, Louise’s website is not Christian, it deals with intimate partner sexual abuse in general, but if you want to go there, it’s called Aphrodite Wounded.

  8. ssofdv

    I agree with you Jeff, “Sexual abuse is not about sex!” Authors Ellen Bass and Laura Davis gave survivors of child sexual abuse a safe place to share the horrors that changed their lives forever. In their book entitled, “The Courage to Heal,” there are numerous graphic accounts of the evil of sexual abuse. My Counselor gave me this book, and it is not an easy read. I closed the book and cried many times. The stories are horrible, and the worst part of all – some women told my story.

    For too long our society, especially God’s people have buried this evil sin not desiring to deal with it. People who have suffered in this way should be allowed to speak about what happened to them. Covering up the sordid details only fosters more denial. There is no way to heal if one cannot face the whole truth – even the graphic details – they are a part of this atrocity that happens every day.

    As the Authors have noted, it takes “courage” to heal. If you don’t put all the pieces of the puzzle together, you have an incomplete account of your soul wounds. God showed me where my own mother was to blame for the crimes against me as a child. Only then did I stop blaming myself. If you do not acknowledge the ugly side of sexual abuse, even the painful details – the abused keeps owning the wrong as if they asked for it, or were at fault somehow. Trust me – I know.

    Concerning your “critic” – Some people do not want truth, for then they would have to look in the mirror – and many people are unable to do so. Keep doing what you are doing Jeff. Barbara, thank you for opening up the dialogue so the abused can finally exhale. They have been holding in the pain for too long. It never goes away, but relief allows them to hold onto sanity.

    Concerning my own healing, I have learned to trust God and myself more. In doing so, I am no longer gasping for air – I have finally learned how to breathe. The abused need a breath of fresh air – thank you for providing that.


    • Jeff Crippen

      Thank you Terry. I think your are right on and your words are very encouraging to us.

    • Thank you Terry!
      “There is no way to heal if one cannot face the whole truth – even the graphic details – they are a part of this atrocity” YES.
      “Covering up the sordid details only fosters more denial.” YES.
      “If you don’t put all the pieces of the puzzle together, you have an incomplete account of your soul wounds.” YES.
      “If you do not acknowledge the ugly side of sexual abuse, even the painful details – the abused keeps owning the wrong as if they asked for it, or were at fault somehow. ” YES.

      An enormous part of healing is realizing right down in your viscera, right down into every cell, “It was not my fault! I am not to blame! I do not have to feel ashamed! Jesus can come right in – even into my inmost parts – and heal me!”

      “… opening up the dialogue so the abused can finally exhale. They have been holding in the pain for too long. It never goes away, but relief allows them to hold onto sanity.” YES.

      Thank you, Terry, for sharing in this work! Every survivor’s story helps someone else.

  9. Anon

    The narrative of Jesus’ crucifixion was also R-rated. I remember once showing a youtube of the crucifixion to my kids and cringed at the violence, then realized that we were watching Ml Gibson’s Passion for the Christ. I suppose you could say it was something kids should not have watched because I believe it was almost R-rated. They watched in fascination and awe as the story of God’s salvation of mankind unfolded before their eyes. Maybe they shouldn’t have put in motion picture form so that wicked people wouldn’t get ideas on how to cruelly punish innocent people.

  10. Jaell

    I’m simply angry that anyone would call themselves a follower of Christ and have this response to uncovering evil.

    Because I delivered the poor who cried for help, And the orphan who had no helper. The man who was dying blessed me; I made the widow’s heart sing. I put on righteousness as my clothing; justice was my robe and my turban. I was eyes to the blind and feet to the lame. I was a father to the poor: and the cause which I knew not I searched out. I broke the fangs of the wicked and snatched the victims from their teeth. Job 29:12-17

    I’ve stood with astonished, stunned, and anguished outrage as the mother of a child who was molested, as ‘good Christians’ turned away squirming and repulsed. In no way does that reflect the heart of the God they claim to represent. Shame! Shame for creating a false religious safe and tidy box and saying it represents the God who is the Defender of the innocent.

    if I have concealed my sin as men do, by hiding my guilt in my heart Did I fear a great multitude, or did the contempt of families terrify me, that I kept silence, and went not out of the door? Job 31:33,34

    If the person who was offended by the voices of innocent and wounded souls crying out is reading this now, beware of arousing the anger of the One who stands as defender and protector of the innocent, the vulnerable and the afflicted.

    For he has not despised or disdained the suffering of the afflicted one; he has not hidden his face from him but has listened to his cry for help. Psalm 22:24

    Therefore do not fear them, for there is nothing concealed that will not be revealed, or hidden that will not be known. Matthew 10:26

    • Jeff Crippen

      Jaell- Very rightly and scripturally stated! Thank you very, very much.

    • Jaell, I love your screen name!
      For those who haven’t seen the connection, here it is:

      But Jael the wife of Heber took a tent peg, and took a hammer in her hand. Then she went softly to him and drove the peg into his temple until it went down into the ground while he was lying fast asleep from weariness. So he died. And behold, as Barak was pursuing Sisera, Jael went out to meet him and said to him, “Come, and I will show you the man whom you are seeking.” So he went in to her tent, and there lay Sisera dead, with the tent peg in his temple. (Judges 4:21-22 ESV)

  11. Jaell

    Jeff, for what it’s worth, I believe that I see God raising you up to be a brother to Job. For answering God’s call, for having a heart that hears the too long voiceless cries, you have my deep gratitude. What I see in this place, is akin to a warrior taking a stand amongst the wounded, while they heal and gain strength to stand together. Once upon a time, the giants in the land were feared by entire armies that cowered and thought them impossible to defeat. After David ran to battle and slew Goliath by the power of the Lord, other mighty men then rose up and also slew giants. I hope and pray that others will gain vision and courage by your faithfulness to the Lord.

    • Jeff Crippen

      Jaell – Well, if I stand it will only be because of the Lord doing it, because I sure wouldn’t be adequate to! Thank you so much for your prayers and encouragement.

      • Your sisters stand behind you, Jeff, every single one of us, and we thank God for you every night, asking for more Jeff Crippens. They are out there. The pastor of the church I spoke at today is one. We can make a difference together. Bless you!

      • Jeff Crippen

        Thanks Morven. Very encouraging to me.

  12. Anonymous

    This is in response to Morven Baker’s comment above. I think one crucial detail that brings fear to me, personally, is this. Yes, men have been abused and yes men likewise have been raised in less than normal homes, yes, yes. But so have the multitudes of women that these men abuse, and yet the women are not abusing. I know some of them do, but the majority of them do not. They allow their experiences as children of sick homes, to change them and make different choices in life, for the most part. I just hate the thought of men getting away with, or now, we the victims, have to “feel sorry” for their abuse, because of their past. They had a choice to make, just like everyone else, and they chose to follow this sick path. I hope we are able to call it what it is. They need help, but they do not need excuses or to be allowed to turn the tables on those they abused, only to lead to false repentance. There are lots of unbelievers, who never abuse their wives or children, and they were raised in abusive homes as well. Please, no excuses. I am dealing with all the excuses people are making for my abuser, thereby being victimized all over again, by the people who are supposed to be helping. We are to be merciful, but mercy demonstrated rightly, leads to godly repentance. Men who are led by God to true repentance, will seek help for themselves and take full responsibility, not blaming anyone else for their actions. They will see and deal with the issues of their raising, but they will not blame their raising, for their sin-filled actions against others.

    • Dear Anonymous, I will leave it to Morven to respond to your comment, but I just want to say thanks for expressing your concerns and your feelings here. I am sure that many readers feel similarly to you. This is tough stuff! And we have to be very careful about how we untangle all the threads.
      Bottom line, an abuser chooses to abuse. Yeah, some may have been abused themselves earlier in their lives, but being a victim is never an excuse to become a perpetrator. And phoney repentance abounds in many churches, and many Christians lap it up. In this, you are totally correct.

      I don’t get the impression that what was happening after Morven’s talk was phoney repentance. And if it was genuine repentance, we all acknowledge here that repentance is not a one-off momentary thing: it is the hard, effort-full task of ‘renewing your mind’, chipping away at a lifetime of habitual beliefs and practices, cutting away rotten wood and learning and consolidating new beliefs, attitudes and behaviors. Many abusers are not prepared to tackle the hard road of reformation, and even fewer stick with it for the long haul. Your misgivings are valid, and I am sorry that your abuser appears to have enlisted the church to believe him to be repentant, when he is only feigning repentance and reformation. Stick with your gut feelings and perceptions. You know better than anyone else what is happening in your personal situation.

      On a more theoretical note –

      Mystery: why do some victims go on to become perpetrators, and others don’t become perpetrators?

      Question: Of all the people who are victimized, why does it appear that males go on to become perpetrators at a greater rate than females do?
      Partial answer: our social conditioning has a lot of influence here. See Lundy Bancroft’s 7-part video series Domestic Violence in Popular Culture. (There is also a transcript of part 2 of the series [Internet Archive link].)

    • Dear Anonymous, Please don’t misunderstand my comments. I completely agree that we are all able to make choices. Not everyone who has been abused will re-abuse, and men have gotten away with a lot of excuses. That’s why I stressed patriarchy in my talk today, about how it is a result of the evil of the fall. My point was that, at least in our community, there are no resources such as groups for men who were molested as children, or who are sexual addicts, or have anger issues and want desperately to change. We live in a small town, and it saddens me that men that WANT to get help sometimes aren’t able to find it. They are talking to their pastor but the specific professional help needed just isn’t around here and, believe me, I know all the resources in the area. The men I talked to today were very genuine in their remorse, and take responsibility and want help. That was part of the marvel of the day. Sadly, recent statistics by Children’s Services show that over 85% of all physical abuse done to children is by women – shutting them up in closets, starving them, tying them to beds, beating them where the marks don’t show…. These statistics do seem to indicate that most women DO pass on their own childhood pain when they don’t get help as well. I think God is doing a work in this little piece of his world, and I was just blessed to be part of it.

  13. cindy burrell

    Pastor Crippen, thank you as always for sharing your heart, even when others are attacking you. I fear that those who are offended by such brutal truth are those who prefer to hush it up, keep it in the dark, and look the other way. It is preferable that suffering believers pretend – in the name of faith. Ridiculous. We have to shine a light on those dark places so that the wounds that fester there can heal!

    • Jeff Crippen

      You’re very welcome, Cindy and thank you for your encouragement (and your book by the way!). Hushing and covering evil is simply not scriptural. We don’t originate evil and broadcast vulgarity that comes from our own sinful flesh. That we are to put to death by the Spirit. But when it comes to exposing wickedness perpetrated upon victims by evil people, then it is time to show it to the whole world for what it is, and give victims freedom to announce from the rooftops what has been done to them.

      • UPDATE Sept 2021: I have come to believe that Jeff Crippen does not practise what he preaches. He vilely persecuted an abuse victim and spiritually abused many other people in the Tillamook congregation. Go here to read the evidence. Jeff has not gone to the people that he spiritually and emotionally abused. He has not apologised to them, let alone asked for their forgiveness.


        Yes, Jeff, that’s the difference!
        DON’T originate or broadcast vulgarity that comes from our own sinful flesh.
        But DO expose the wickedness that is being perpetrated upon victims by evil people.
        And DO give victims freedom to announce from the rooftops what has been done to them, if they wish to tell others
        Thanks for putting it so clearly!

    • And thank you from me, too, Cindy. I had some colly wobbles after writing that post about sexual abuse, I can tell you! Your encouragement is appreciated.

  14. Anewanon

    So if a person has a newspaper in his trunk folded back to a news article about a local date rape of a woman using drugs in her drink and this person admits to using this article for self pleasure, then this person probably has a problem with power and control?

    [Note from Barb Roberts, Ed.: I changed the screen name on this comment just for safety’s sake, since I was not sure if the commenter had given her real name.]

    • I am not a forensic psychologist or psychiatrist, but it sounds to me that kind of person probably has a problem with power and control. He may also have been the perpetrator of a date rape where he secretly put a drug in the victim’s drink. He might even have done the crime that is reported in that newspaper article. Or he might be using the article to mentally rehearse and plan for committing such a crime in the future. Any way you look at it, it’s chilling.

  15. Finding Answers

    (Light airbrushing…)

    The first time I saw a documentary on the pornography industry, my university prof stated, “No one leaves the classroom until we have had time to discuss it.” The intent was to ensure there was time to process what we had seen….

    In hindsight, I do not remember any mention of trigger warnings prior to the viewing. I do remember being grateful for the information the documentary presented, though difficult to watch – it was pretty hard core.

    Thirty years later, I saw another documentary on the pornography industry. The approach was different, relying on facts, stats, and personal interviews. Again, I was grateful for the information, but for different reasons. One of the filmmakers, present at the screening, had interviewed a person behind many of the movies. The filmmaker said he spent the rest of the night vomiting once the interview was complete.

    I read the post Barb wrote, grateful to hear yet another side of the story. Heartbroken, but glad the words weren’t censored. (I had read a number of survivor stories on other websites prior to ACFJ.) How else is the person to be heard?

    Were it not for the documentaries and website stories, I might still be wearing blinders. Shutting our eyes to the truth doesn’t help effect change.

    I pondered adding my own story to the other post, but have no way to airbrush it without removing most of the story. None of my counsellors ever heard much detail, nor did they ever ask. I have never written it down, nor spoken it aloud. The closest thing I have done is asked God to look at the picture in my mind….even knowing He already sees.

    So to those who criticize communities like ACFJ for taking a stand, for allowing victims / survivors to air their stories, bah humbug. Without the freedom to speak….

    …….the shame remains.

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