A Cry For Justice

Awakening the Evangelical Church to Domestic Violence and Abuse in its Midst

Comfort for the Oppressed and Terror for the Oppressor (Psalm 10)

Psalm 10 —

Why, O LORD, do you stand far away? Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble? In arrogance the wicked hotly pursue the poor; let them be caught in the schemes that they have devised. For the wicked boasts of the desires of his soul, and the one greedy for gain curses and renounces the LORD. In the pride of his face the wicked does not seek him; all his thoughts are, “There is no God.” His ways prosper at all times; your judgments are on high, out of his sight; as for all his foes, he puffs at them. He says in his heart, “I shall not be moved; throughout all generations I shall not meet adversity.” His mouth is filled with cursing and deceit and oppression; under his tongue are mischief and iniquity. He sits in ambush in the villages; in hiding places he murders the innocent. His eyes stealthily watch for the helpless; he lurks in ambush like a lion in his thicket; he lurks that he may seize the poor; he seizes the poor when he draws him into his net.

The helpless are crushed, sink down, and fall by his might. He says in his heart, “God has forgotten, he has hidden his face, he will never see it.”

Arise, O LORD; O God, lift up your hand; forget not the afflicted. Why does the wicked renounce God and say in his heart, “You will not call to account”? But you do see, for you note mischief and vexation, that you may take it into your hands; to you the helpless commits himself; you have been the helper of the fatherless. Break the arm of the wicked and evildoer; call his wickedness to account till you find none. The LORD is king forever and ever; the nations perish from his land. O LORD, you hear the desire of the afflicted; you will strengthen their heart; you will incline your ear to do justice to the fatherless and the oppressed, so that man who is of the earth may strike terror no more.

10 Comments

  1. Amen and amen.

  2. Amen

  3. Reblogged this on Speakingtruthinlove's Blog and commented:
    Getting things backwards is part of the fallen human nature, but you would expect the Church to be able to get this one right. We should embrace the victim who is deeply wounded and confront the offender who is practicing evil.

  4. I found that Scripture either right before or right when I was taking my step of faith to separate. The Scripture gave me comfort and affirmation. Of course not every word or phrase applied to my situation and many people would counter my situation as “mild” or marginalize as “nominal”. Maybe I am weak, selfish, unstable, reactive, or deluded, but I know that separating when I did was what was needed to preserve my own sanity. Now that I am out, enjoying some relief, good sleep, and emotional well being, sometimes I doubt my decision to leave. Now that I am removed from the daily pressure, I wonder if it was really that bad or if I was imagining things. I don’t know with any certainty, but I do know I have loved being separated and I start crying and feel triggered when he pressures me to return or when I feel someone else is pressuring me to return to him. I panic. I want to be open to the hope of a miracle, but right now, I am still recovering and decompressing from what he has put me through in the days and weeks following the separation. Just writing those words lets me know why I separated. Life with him was always all about him. He doesn’t feel bad or even think about what he put me through emotionally and relationally- that is not even on his radar. Will it ever be?

    • In my experience, no.

      I stayed thirty years thinking maybe I could find the magic words to make him realize how his bullying and hateful words damaged his children. I accepted what he dished out to me, absorbing all I could to keep them sheltered. I believed with all my heart it was my fault and somehow, if I could just figure out what I was doing wrong, he would wake up and change.

      Stupidest thing I ever did.

      By the time I got out (and by that time, it took a sovereign act of God), I was a quivering mess that couldn’t stand to hear his voice or see his name pop up on email without falling apart. I didn’t speak his name (willingly) for three years. I’m still looking forward to the moment I can block and delete him for good.

      Make no mistake– if they do change, they would be repenting like crazy and taking responsibility for all their crap. They will not make you feel like a naughty puppy. They will not be telling everyone else how you are too sensitive or just have issues because ‘you know how she is.” They will tell others, “she was a strong, beautiful, Godly woman and I put her through hell. I understand why she doesn’t want to speak to me and I don’t blame her.”

      And we all know how likely that is.

      And there were plenty of times he *said* he would change, he *said* he knew how much we hurt, he *said* things would improve and I believed him. Sometimes, you have to let go and realize– if they change, yippee! Let them go forth and have a wonderful life in some far corner of the universe without you.

      • “They will tell others, “she was a strong, beautiful, Godly woman and I put her through hell. I understand why she doesn’t want to speak to me and I don’t blame her.”

        This is so good right here. Could you imagine an abuser building his wife up in public in ever possible way? And not in a way that puts the focus on him (“I’m to be pitted for how helpless I am”). I can’t even comprehend what that would look like.

      • Hampton

        I feel u….well said.

      • Hi Hampton, welcome to the blog!
        if you haven’t done so yet I encourage you to check out our New Users Info page 🙂

      • Jen

        Thank you, Ida, for sharing your story. I really needed to hear it put that way. I still hear, “I HAVE changed! You just don’t see it! You’ll never see it!”

        He’s right! I have NEVER seen or heard…… this is what I did to you (spelling out everything)… “I treated your mother like a piece of dirt, a body to be used and abused. She felt worthless because I treated her like she was worthless.” Nope. I haven’t seen it! His image (to him – character to me) hasn’t changed. I have him blocked on my phone… can’t wait to block his email address some day too!

      • G’day Jen
        you may like to check out our New Users Info page (it gives tips for how to guard your safety while commenting here).

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