What are the guys supposed to do?
I just came across this post What are the Guys Supposed to Do? written by a blogger called Jonathan. He describes himself as “a proud recovering Southern Baptist” (! LOL) He writes:
Men, listen, we’ve had the upper hand.
The church knows our story inside and out.
I suspect most of us who have moved away from patriarchy (including complementarianism) probably know a whole lot of people who have remained. They are the people we work with, hang out with, go to church with.
It’s not okay for us to be silent about this. If we truly believe in equality, we’ll come alongside our sisters as full partners in this journey.
Here are some things we need to do:
- The”Boy’s Only Club” mentality in ministry has to die.
WelcomeRecruit women into our ministry circles and treat them as equals. We need them.
- Speak up when we see gender injustice happening, even if we feel we might face backlash for it. That’s okay. It’s part of the journey.
- Show empathy. We don’t automatically understand what it feels like to be unwelcome, shunned, minimized, repressed, patronized or maligned because of our gender. Try to see things from that perspective.
- Guard our own thoughts and conversations so that we never speak of women as anything but full partners. No condescension, no generalizations (“all women are like that,” etc.), no whining.
- The word “bitch” is never an appropriate term for women. Neither is “slut” or “whore” and a bunch of others. Stop using them. Stop pretending it’s funny when your friends use them.
- Don’t be defensive. I’ve seen this in responses to my blogs. To me, men who disagree will usually respond with a thoughtful answer. If my intelligent and capable wife gets into the conversation, all of the sudden it’s personal. That’s not okay. It’s insulting and, frankly, quite immature.
Women (and men), what am I leaving off my list that needs to be there?
Now I know some people here don’t believe in women pastors and suchlike, and I’m not wanting to open up that can of worms tonight. (truly! pretty please!) But dear reader, you might just like to choof on over to Jonathan’s blog and add your suggestions about “what the guys are supposed to do”.
I did. I said “Guys, wake up to the epidemic of domestic abuse and start doing something about it!” (or words to that effect).