Christian Dating and Chat – How to Connect with a Psychopath
UPDATE Sept 2021: I have come to believe that Jeff Crippen does not practise what he preaches. He vilely persecuted an abuse victim and spiritually abused many other people in the Tillamook congregation. Go here to read the evidence. Jeff has not gone to the people that he spiritually and emotionally abused. He has not apologised to them, let alone asked for their forgiveness.
[October 8, 2022: There have been some changes made to this post. For more information, read the Editors’ notes at the bottom of the post. Editors.]
We are working with a woman who professes Christ, who was severely abused by her ex for 37 years, and who has been away from him for about one year. In that short time, she has very nearly connected with two more full-blown psychopaths. How? The internet. Specifically through “Christian” chat channels. To all victims of domestic violence and abuse, here is a warning all of us need to get — if you go looking for a relationship on the internet after escaping from one abuser, prepare to jump right into the arms of another one. Stay away! Throw your computer in the trash if you have to (well, then you wouldn’t be able to read this blog….hmmmm…..well, do what you need to).
The first guy this lady connected with was a real loser. Maybe not a full-blown psychopath, but a guy who had been through numerous marriages. Oh, yes — and he was a Christian. He was, I tell you. He told her so. He loved Jesus. She ‘fessed up, to her credit, in our small abuse victim support / therapy group. We worked through it, got her disconnected from him, and all was well….we thought.
About the same time she went a-cruisin’ in the Christian world of Christian chat where everyone, of course, is a Christian and they all tell how they love Jesus and they quote Scripture and….enter, let’s call him Anthony. For some months, Anthony and our friend chatted. She was absolutely convinced that Anthony was a godly man. Why, Anthony even had her call his pastor, which our friend did. His pastor (a she) said Anthony was a wonderful Christian man. Last week our friend ‘fessed up to the group once again. Anthony had been telling her he is a computer expert and that he had been monitoring her chat activities with others and he wanted to know what she was talking to them about. Oh, and Anthony was making preparations to come on down and see her. He had bought rings. RINGS!! How does that line go in Lord of the Rings? The one to bind them all!
“Whoa!” the group members screamed! “You are connected with a predatory psychopath. What in the %^&$ do you think you are doing” (symbols for Christian exclamations)? She wasn’t having any of our objections, so we turned up the heat. “How many of you think our friend here is messing up big time?” I asked. All hands shot up in the air. It took us quite a bit more time to get her attention. She promised she would disconnect Anthony. She gave me his email. I emailed him and in as tactful of the language of psychopathy, I gave him the “Dear John” letter. Today I received two threatening emails from him. He has been leaving messages on her phone every 5 minutes, threatening her that if she does not call him he is going to email compromising photos of her to her church and to her place of employment. She had Skyped him and he claims he took her picture. Don’t know if that’s true.
I sent her to the police. Not much they can do. Now she has endangered herself, me, my wife, our whole church. Our only hope is that Anthony is all full of it. He may be — apparently marriage hasn’t worked for him (his wife was a “real witch”, he says so) — and he lives with his mommy.
If I sound sarcastic it’s because I’m mad. Mad at wicked men like “Walter” who cruise the internet like a shark looking for easy prey, which abuse victims are. And mad at my friend for being so….so….well, you know. I intend to stay mad at Anthony. I won’t stay mad at my friend unless she does it again. Then we’re done. I won’t let even my friends endanger my family or my church. She says she has learned her lesson.
I hope you have too.
[October 8, 2022: Editors’ notes:
—For some comments made prior to October 8, 2022 that quoted from the post, the text in the comment that was quoted from the post might no longer be an exact match.
—For some comments made prior to October 8, 2022 that quoted from the post, the text in the comment that was quoted from the post might no longer be found in the post.
If you would like to compare the text in the comments made prior to October 8, 2022 that quoted from the post to the post as it is now (October 8, 2022), click here [Internet Archive link] for the most recent Internet Archive copy of the post.]