Excellent Quotes on Domestic Violence from Diane Langberg
UPDATE Sept 2021: I have come to believe that Jeff Crippen does not practise what he preaches. He vilely persecuted an abuse victim and spiritually abused many other people in the Tillamook congregation. Go here to read the evidence. Jeff has not gone to the people that he spiritually and emotionally abused. He has not apologised to them, let alone asked for their forgiveness.
The following quotations are taken from Diane Langberg’s book Suffering and the Heart of God (New Growth Press, 2015, pp 258-259) –
Scripture gives us a basis for holding abusers accountable for their behavior. The law that is to govern the marital relationship is the law of love, and wife abuse [Langberg acknowledges women can be abusers as well] of any sort is a profound abuse of that law. God says, ‘Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved…’ (Ephesians 5:25). That statement alone shatters any rationalization or minimization of a screaming fit or an insulting remark, a demeaning name or maneuvering for power in the relationship.
She also asks these questions of the church –
Why, when confronted with violence or abuse in a home, have we often placed the burden on the victim to justify her actions, to somehow prove that she did not ‘make’ him do it, rather than on the abuser to confess his sins and demonstrate change? We have frequently overemphasized the response of the abused to the exclusion of confronting the behavior of the abuser. Are we afraid he will turn his anger on us? Do we fear confrontation? Do we fear we will be accused of not holding the marriage covenant sacred? Do we really think protecting a home full of sin is keeping that sacred covenant? Do we fear standing with the oppressed?