A Cry For Justice

Awakening the Evangelical Church to Domestic Violence and Abuse in its Midst

Tag Archives: Lundy Bancroft

Thursday Thought — How Do I Make Conflicts with Him Go Better?

You have perhaps noticed that I haven’t written about how you can resolve conflicts with your partner more constructively.  That’s no accident.  I don’t believe that a woman can make things go better with a controlling or abusive man by changing how she argues with him.  Some people may say that you should bring things …

Continue reading

Thursday Thought — Feeling Like You’ll Never Get Over This

After enough times of being torn apart by your partner’s cruel side, you can come to feel like nothing could ever put you back together again, and like the pain will never go away. But it will.  You aren’t always going to feel this bad.  Healing is a long process, especially when you’ve been harmed …

Continue reading

Thursday Thought — His Attachment to Payback

Women who are in unhealthy relationships struggle with the question “Is my partner’s behavior normal?” You may wonder whether the problem is that you’re just too sensitive, or that your expectations are unrealistic.  One way to get clear on the nature of your partner’s problem is to notice when he gets you back for doing …

Continue reading

Thursday Thought — Lundy Bancroft: Strategies for Healing from Domestic Abuse & Avoiding Abusers

As many of you know we highly recommend Lundy Bancroft and his books.  (His books are listed on our Resources.) In addition to his books, we also have made our readers aware of youtube videos of presentations by Lundy. IMPORTANT NOTE:  While we endorse Lundy’s writings about the dynamics of domestic abuse, we do not recommend …

Continue reading

Thursday Thought — Is Therapy the Answer?

Our society’s answer to everything that troubles people has become “You should go to therapy.”  But is talking with a psychotherapist succeeding at making people feel better?  The outcome research is mixed; it shows therapy having modest benefits on average, with many clients not finding it particularly helpful.  Under what circumstances does therapy work for …

Continue reading

Thursday Thought — Looking at His Anger Problem

When a man chronically mistreats his partner, his anger is often his most obvious quality.  The result is his partner is likely to believe that his anger is the problem, and therapists or other professional (and church leaders) who get involved tend to jump to the same conclusion.  Many judges order abusive men to attend …

Continue reading